Saturday, May 16, 2009

Bagel and Pooker: a sister's kind of love

Pooker started another set of classes this week. She is talking a mini-mester class as she works to accumulate credits. She has herself on a very aggressive schedule. Bagel must have thought that Pooker was off for the summer and that she would NOT have to share her. We were blessed with a short school week the week before. Pooker had a final and then was off for the rest of the week.

Tuesday Bagel came down stairs and crawled into my bed. She was sobbing. She said that she missed dad who was out of town for a few days on a short business trip and she missed Pooker. Upon further discussion Bagel broke down in uncontrollable sobs.
"I miss her so much, mom. What will we do when she goes away to school? I don't want Pooker to ever go away to college. Or get married. Or move away."

My response didn't help.
"I can't wait for Pooker to go away. I will miss her so much but it is just part of growing up."

"How can you say that? I love her and don't ever want her to leave."

I was the oldest so I guess I can't relate to those feeling much at all. I know that my heart will break as each child moves away but I hope that it will also be filled with joy as they grow into the adults God calls them to be. I suspect that with Pooker we will grow closer. We are so much alike in many ways that it is hard for me to find that balance of pushing too hard and then not pushing hard enough. We have a wonderful relationship. I trust her and I admire her. I know we will be friends for life. I love how close I have grown to my mom in the years of adulthood. I look forward to sharing that with each child.

Bagel's life is very different. Pooker is the outlet for the little ones. When everyone needs a break from mom she packs them up and takes them out. She helps them with their studies, their toys and their chores. She isn't told to do these things she just does them. Pooker loves her siblings so much and she takes great care of them. I knew she would want to know about Bagel's stress. When she got home from morning classes we talked.

Without skipping a beat Pooker decided that Bagel needed some one on one time. They headed out for a slushy. They talked and they came home to take these silly pictures. I am confidant that the two will grow closer over the years and always be friends.
Thank God for sisters.


  1. Your posts touch my heart as I read each one! What beautiful children you have; both inside and out.

    I can understand the little one's sadness/anxiety/fear of losing her big sister to college! I dread thinking of Mary going away. In fact, we often joke that Mary CAN attend KU (I'm an MU grad) JUST b/c it is 12 miles from our house~ha ha!!!

    My logical brain knows that I want my children to grow up to be independent, loving, responsible young adults that will go on to develop deep and meaningful relationships with their parents and others, but right now they are just too little to think that far ahead!

    Mary is my in vitro miracle and no matter how old she gets or how far away she lives, she will always hold a special place in my heart for all the physical, emotional, and spiritual pain we went thru to conceive her!!!

    I love your outlook on life and need more of that!

    Blessings, Shannon,

    P.S. Thanks for dropping by and leaving your kind comments on the Rooster apron post!

  2. I love that entry, Shannon! You have such a wonderful family, and the children are amazing with each other! God bless you guys!


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